Story time.

 'People create stories create people; or rather stories create people create stories.' - Chinua Achebe. (R.I.P)

I promised myself that giving up twitter would mean more writing  I have actually kept that up. The only problem is I haven't been able to share my work. This has been for different reasons and yet none whatsoever. (This all makes sense to me, so forgive me if you are confused.)

Anyways, school's out, and exams are fast approaching and I'm doing everything in my power to avoid actually doing work. But that's not what brings me here, believe it or not, I sometimes feel writing is work and i prefer to perform. I remember starting out this year intensely gassed about the opportunities and stuff I had lined up... and they are still there. Just my enthusiasm has been curbed by reality and well frankly now I've just been waiting for things to  happen.

I have all been waiting for 'time', when in fact time is running from me. I know I know, we're all bored of he whole 'time is of the essence' speech, but really and truly we never should be. It took the death of a great writer to remind me that I too wanted to be a writer. I mean I am a writer, I'm not sure what level, I'm not even sure who my audience is, but I am a writer. I have started writing, but what happens when I'm done with this book? and the next? You see, to be as great as Achebe, I need to do more than just write. I need to put myself out there and quite frankly, there's no better 'time' than NOW.

My problem? Procrastination! You've read this somewhere before? We all have, but what do we do after? Just sit back and say '5 more minutes'. I'm not trying to force you out of this habit, Lord knows I didn't drag you into it. But I want you to know that the reason things aren't happening to you, is cos your'e not happening to things. Be places, speak to people trust me, opportunities will come faster than expected.

I recently decided I wanted to teach and well, I got a couple of thumbs ups, and go for it's but the confirmation was when I put my C.V online and I got offered a teaching job (no experience yet) along with approaches from tutoring agencies. This isn't me trying to brag, if anything, I was shocked! It's just giving an example of doing something to do more.

I may not die as great as Achebe, I may die even greater, but I know not doing anything means I won't be remembered beyond those I've met and that is NOT what I desire. My story and my person are yet to be created.

Hows!?

These are just a couple of the questions I ask myself...

How do you forget someone that wasn't even there?
How do you fake interest, when you truly don't care.
Well it's not that you don't, it's just you don't want to.
And the harder you try not to, the more you actually do.

How do you hold on to what never did exist.
How do you fight feelings and uphold an emotional resist.
It's not that you don't want to, It's just it's not right that you do.
And the harder you fight it, the more you want it too.

How do you convince yourself that it's for the best, when it's clear that you're in pain?
How do you psyche yourself that it's only ever positive and get back on your feet again.
It's not that you can't, it's just that it's too hard to.
And the harder to try, the more difficult its gets too.

How do you prepare yourself for an unexpected event?
How do you an foresee an unfortunate experience or prevent?
It's not even possible, A thing man can't do
When the future is of what he has no clue.


How?

© Toni Peters